You. Me. Let's....! Ah forget about it...

I've never been good with girls...well...that's not really entirely true but for the sake of this blog, let's just go with that =/

Let me lay down the facts right in front you so you don't get lost later on...

- I have been single for all of my life...all 18(almost 19) years of it

- I have been rejected enough times that I know when a girl isn't interested just by her tone of the first word she says in response to me asking her out.

Let's get on with it shall we?

Whenever there's some girl I find to be interesting/attractive I just shrug it off these days....maybe it's because I've realised one too many things....or maybe it's because I fear rejection because the pain of it still scars me emotionally. But I've learned quite a few things as a result of these heart breaking rejections. One of them is that persistence NEVER EVER pays off, no matter what girls say. Lingering feelings for someone who rejected you should be thrown in the trash as soon as you realise they're there. It's kinda like....saving that sandwich that gave you indigestion the first time around...when you come back to it, it's still gonna give you indigestion the second time around no matter how much you blame it on the drink you had with it last time, in fact it's gonna fuck your stomach up even more this time cuz it's been rotting since the day you first attempted to eat it. Girls I know tend to say "You still have feelings for ******? Awww....Isn't that sweet?" To answer the second half of the question....No, it's fucking bitter like that rotting sandwich I mentioned earlier.

That brings me to my second point...I will never trust advice on getting a girl from another girl and I will never ever accept the "Don't worry, you'll find someone" bullshit that comes from a smug couple who thinks they know everything about you. You know who you are....

Moving along...50% of girls I've been attracted to have been "snagged" already and the other half have been worst liars I've yet to meet. For the girls who already have a boyfriend ATTACH A SIGN THAT SAYS ATTACHED OR SOME SHIT LIKE THAT!!! WE'RE (I believe I speak for alotta guys here =]) SICK OF FINDING OUT YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND AFTER WE GO THROUGH THE DAUNTING TASK OF ASKING YOU OUT!!! -cough- So where was I? Oh, right the second half of the equation...I know you don't want to hurt my feelings when you say some bullshit like "I don't wanna lose you as a friend..." or "I'm not ready for this..." but for fuck's sake....can I have an honest answer for once? Is it too much to ask? Am I too unattractive for you? Am I too much of a dickhead? A simple dead honest answer will incapacitate me for a while....but at least I'll know what the fuck is wrong with me and not leave me with those unanswered questions that lead to more insecurities...I'm not trying to be mean or anything when I say this but you're worse than those bitchy girls to me, at least a bitch tells it as it is. Kinda sad when you think about it =.=

So anyways...I've given up on finding a girlfriend, I realise that won't find someone who I'm interested in who somehow happens to also be interested in me. It's not as if I've turned gay or anything like that (but life would be so much easier if I were -.-)...it's just that I've become too tired of chasing after someone who won't reciprocate my genuine feelings. Fuck the chase...I can't be fucked to do the work...for once in my life I want to be the one chased but even if that happens....I doubt I'll care, I'm beyond caring about something I've never had or unlikely to have.

Some day, I might just settle for some one who I have no interest in simply because she was who was available at the time...I'll put my all into the relationship but... my heart won't be in it (corny/cheesy w/e you wanna call it...I know), that's for sure and I'm pretty damn certain she'll realise that....Soooo...I'm just settling for a life as a single dickhead living one step at a time.

If you're even remotely interested in me, let's see if you can match my pace.